An Anxiety Relief Technique That Calms Your Mind And Halts Your Panic Attack
Do you wish you had a magic stick that could make all your anxiety simply disappear?
Well this one particular technique may not be magical, but it sure has the power to halt a panic attack in its tracks and make you feel calm again – quick sticks!
There’s a reason it’s my absolute favourite technique to use when I’m feeling anxious and it works everytime.
Want to know what it is and how to use it?
Then check out today’s episode by clicking play below or listening on your fav podcast platform.
One of the most effective ways to reduce anxiety when it’s flaring up…
…when you start to feel that unease in your stomach and the pounding in your heart, the tightness squeezing your chest or the sweaty palms and the chaos swirling around and around in your head…
…is the 90-10 method.
This technique quickly reduces those symptoms when they pop up. But even better, they stop your anxiety flaring up again later on.
This is because the 90-10 method addresses the cause of your anxiety. This technique doesn’t make you feel momentarily better. It doesn’t distract you or ground you back down. It deals with the reason why your anxiety is popping up in the first place. So you can let that anxiety go and overcome it.
The 90-10 method can be used on all levels of anxiety. Whether it’s just low level anxiousness, overwhelm or unease, or more when your heart is pounding and your thoughts are spiralling in your head.
How does this magical anxiety-neutralising technique work?
10% of the time you allow yourself to wallow in problem mode.
Go grab that ice cream, curl into a ball and cry your eyes out…allow yourself to feel absolutely miserable in the moment. Let yourself feel like crap because whatevers making you feel anxious is sucky and it’s ok to give these emotions a voice and let it out. Let those emotions free. Feel anger, irritation, sadness, anxiety. Feel whatever you need to feel.
It doesn’t mean that you’re being petty.
It doesn’t mean that you’re less than, or that you’re weak.
It just means that you’re allowing yourself to be human and to feel your emotions.
Allow yourself to feel those emotions for 10% of the time. If you’ve got an hour, sit in those emotions for 6 minutes.
Then switch over and 90% of the time, go into solution mode.
Solution mode is anything you need to work out why you’re feeling anxious and find a solution to it.
Sit down, find a quiet place, take a cleansing breath and then ask yourself these 3 questions.
P.S. Let the truth come out. No one else needs to know these answers, so be as raw and open with yourself as you can. There are no wrong answers.
#1. What do I need right now to feel better?
- Is it a hug?
- Is it to pick up the phone and tell someone a piece of your mind?
- Is it to quit your job?
- Is it to have a big cry?
It doesn’t matter what it is and you don’t have to do it, just be honest with yourself for what your heart is screaming out for right now.
#2. What was the issue that made me feel this way?
Be 100% honest with yourself. You don’t need to act on these realisations, just allow your subconscious to tell you what you need.
- Is it to call someone & set them straight about something they said?
- Is it to change the way someone treats you & if so, how would you like to be treated?
- Is it that you feel stuck and you don’t like the way you currently run your household or how you do your work?
- Is it that your head feels chaotic, you feel overwhelmed, over worked and like you’re losing your sanity?
- Is it to figure out what you actually want in life, because you’re truthfully stuck in a rut that’s not heading where you want to go?
#3. What needs to happen to stop this from happening again?
Start with the raw truth and then work backwards to find a solution that’s comfortable to you.
- It may not be calling that person and telling them a piece of your mind. Instead it may be listing all the reasons why their opinion has no impact on your life and making a plan to avoid talking to them. Or maybe being the one to change the conversation with them so that when they make a comment that triggers you, you have something you can say that makes you feel better and stops them in their tracks from making you feel worse.
- If you want to be treated differently, it may be writing a list of how you’d ideally like to be treated by the person or relationship that’s making you feel anxious, and noting down the things that mean a lot to you. Then bringing it up in conversation with them. It’s much easier to fix a relationship you have with a friend, partner or family member when you know what you want, rather than what you want them not to do – and they’ll be way more receptive to making a change you love, rather than trying to change something about them you don’t like.
- If it’s because you feel stuck and you don’t like the way you do something in your household or at work, it may be that you need to sit down with a blank piece of paper and plan out how an ideal day looks in your house or at work. What you’d be doing and what you’d be achieving. And then look at your life and notice the parts that you want to be doing on a day to day basis that aren’t currently in your life. And then create a plan for how you could start to include it into your daily routine. Again, don’t focus on what you don’t like, introduce and start doing what you want to be doing. Focus on the positives.
- If it’s that you feel chaotic, overwhelmed and like you’re losing your sanity, it could be that you need to get clarity again on what you really want. Sit down with a blank piece of paper and write down absolutely everything you need to do and want to do. Then prioritise that list with what’s super important and will make a big difference in your life, all the way down to the things that don’t make a difference if they’re done or not. It could even be just finding a diary that vibes for you and scheduling your day and making a plan.
It’s finding the right solution for you.
- What do you need right now to feel better?
- What was the issue that has made you feel this way?
- And what needs to happen to stop this from happening again in the future?
What solution makes you feel good and that you’ve solved the issue that was triggering your anxiety and your emotions.
This technique has that beautiful combination of allowing your emotions to be heard in a safe and controlled manner because you’re giving them a section of time to scream out and rage, but then you’re also figuring out a solution to the main issue that’s causing your anxiety in the first place. You’re figuring out the answer to stop that anxiety trigger from triggering your again in the future.
This will take a huge weight off your shoulders, because a huge chunk of anxiety is a fear of the unknown, a fear of the what if and basically catastrophizing about the future – whether you can control it or not.
And a big way to reduce anxiety is to find the solution. Create a contingency plan so you have something in your back pocket if that what if or that unknown ever does happen.
You are the one in control of your life, so create solutions to fix or heal what’s upsetting you and making you anxious. It’s way more powerful and effective to feel anxiety-free for the long term, rather than letting anxiety control and suffocate you with worries and fears.
The next time you’re feeling anxious and you feel like you can’t get out of out that anxious spiral, use this method.
- Allow yourself 10% of the time to wallow and do what you need to express your emotions in all their glory.
- Then transition and allow yourself 90% of the time to figure out a solution to what’s making you feel anxious.
Spend 6 minutes wallowing. Then 54 minutes in solution mode asking yourself these three questions:
- What do I need to feel better right now?
- What was the issue that made me feel this way?
- What needs to happen to stop this happening again?
And I promise you a massive weight off your shoulders will be lifted and your anxiety will massively reduce.